I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Randomize
