Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
