And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
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