She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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