My room smells like vodka and shame
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
