she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize