Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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