i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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