last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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