It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
