p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Randomize
