I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
