bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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