Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize