so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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