oh god the rape fog is back!
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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