Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
vagina is talking i cant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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