all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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