At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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