So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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