I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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