ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
