I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
