As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
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