i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize