these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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