he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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