In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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