Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
