I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i wish my penis had a tongue
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize