Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
