I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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