I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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