It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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