I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
