now i know why i became what i already was.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
