I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
