my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
