o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
