Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
