Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize