Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
