I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
