I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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