Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
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