this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize