you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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