I want to stick my p in your. b.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
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