smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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