our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
