U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
