and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
